We both understood that we were now officially law-breakers, violators of a policy that had the power to destroy our livelihoods and reputations. And, really, is there a bigger buzzkill than that?Quietly, he pulled himself out of the bed and dressed. I watched him, silent and somber, slowly walk out the room, closing the door. In the aftermath, I was too satisfied, too surprised to understand that this was a one-time thing. Yes, we were best friends but, no, we could never be anything more, not the way things were for us. At the time, I was too invested in my work, I loved my job, I loved the military but I also loved other men and those two things couldn't coexist peacefully.Later, I feel into that newbie trap of falling for the first guy to fuck me. I thought I loved him and I told him so. He was understanding and matter-of-fact in letting me down not-so-easily. We fell out of touch for a while afterward. He started hanging out with other guys and I started my journey of. ...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
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